Stress Wellness – What is it?

You experience stress when you feel like the demands placed on you — such as work, school or relationships — exceed your ability to cope with them. It’s hard not to get overwhelmed from time to time with everything most people have on their plate these days. Between juggling work, family, and other commitments, you can become too stressed out from being too busy. Over time, feeling too much stress can cause a variety of long-term health problems; it can also affect the quality of your work and your productivity.

Different people handle stress differently, in different situations: you’ll handle stress better if you’re confident in your abilities, you can change the situation to take control, and feel that you have the help and support needed to do an excellent job. Some stress can be beneficial, producing a boost that provides the drive and energy to help people get through situations like exams or work deadlines.

The negative health consequences of stress can be reduced by finding positive, healthy ways to manage stress as it occurs. There’s no single set of best practices for managing stress. What works best for each of us is as different as each of us is.

What causes it?

Stress can be caused by a variety of things including sudden stressful situations like having a major issue at work or a crisis at home that needs your immediate attention, or by ongoing concerns about your work, finances, health, or family.

People are most susceptible to feeling stress when they:

• aren’t feeling well physically
• aren’t sleeping well
• don’t have a network of support
• experience a major life change such as starting a new job, moving, having a baby, getting married, or the death of a loved one
• haven’t been eating healthy

Each of us has our own stress threshold. Certain things that may upset you might not even make one of your friends raise an eyebrow. For example, some people are affected when they experience large crowds and noisy environments, while others react to silence and free time.

Reactions to Stress

As humans, our stress response consists of two instinctive reactions – the “fight or flight” response and the General Adaptation Syndrome (GAS). These reactions can happen independently or occur together.

Fight or Flight

The well-known “fight or flight” response is a short-term survival response triggered when we see something that we perceive as a threat or experience a shock designed to help us survive from life-threatening situations. It causes our brains to release stress hormones that prepare the body to either “fly” from the threat, or “fight” it. These hormones energize us, but they also make us anxious, irritable, and excitable.

The problem with the fight or flight response is that while it was designed for survival situations, we can also experience it in non-life-threatening situations. Having the fight or flight response kick in when you’re simply dealing with short deadlines, interpersonal conflict, or having to speak in public makes these situations extra stressful. What we need in these types of situations, is a calm, controlled, rational, and socially-sensitive response.

General Adaptation Syndrome (GAS)

The lesser-known General Adaptation Syndrome is a response mechanism for dealing with long-term stress. It shows that we typically go through three distinct phases when we are coping with this kind of stress:

1. The alarm phase: Reacting
2. The resistance phase: Adapting and coping
3. The exhaustion phase: Existence Functioning

It demonstrates that long-term stress results in negative outcomes.

It’s important to keep in mind that these are instinctive responses to stress that we can overcome with smart stress management strategies.

Signs of Stress

Everyone’s reaction to stress is different, so it is common that they also show different signs of being under stress. However, here are some of the signs and symptoms common to most people:

• Changes in appetite
• Cold or sweaty hands and feet
• Consistent feelings of being overwhelmed or overloaded
• Constant fatigue
• Excessive sleeping, or insomnia
• Feeling overwhelmed
• Frequent headaches
• Frequent heartburn, stomach pain, or nausea
• Frequent mood swings
• Irritability and angry episodes
• Jaw pain
• Obsessive or compulsive behaviors
• Panic attacks
• Persistent difficulty concentrating
• Significant weight gain or loss
• Social withdrawal or isolation

Possible solutions

Developing effective stress management skills and strategies takes time and practice, but it is essential for each of us. Here are some excellent ways to make it easier:

Identify the Sources of Stress in Your Life

Learning to effectively manage the stress in your life beings with being able to identify the key sources of stress in it. Sounds simple right? It’s a little more complex than it appears. Identifying major stressors in your life is easy since they tend to be big events – think marriage, divorce, having a baby, changing jobs, or moving. Identifying the sources of chronic stress tends to be a bit more challenging because you need to look internally to your own thoughts, feelings, and behaviors and at those people who play a constant role in your life to see how they contribute to your everyday stress levels. Ask yourself the tough questions about your attitude, excuses, and habits:

• Are you guilty of explaining away long-term stress as temporary? If you find yourself uttering phrases like “I just have a million things going on right now,” it’s time to think about the real situation.
• Have you adopted being stressful as a personality trait or highlight of your home or work life? If you describe yourself using phrases like “I have a lot of nervous energy” or your office as “Things are always intense around here,” it’s time to take a step back and look at why.
• Do you blame your stress on other people or outside events, or view it as entirely normal and unexceptional?

In order to take control of your stress level, you must accept responsibility for the role you play in creating or maintaining it.

Eliminate Your Triggers

One of the quickest ways to take control of your stress is to figure out what the biggest causes of stress in your life are and eliminate as many of them as possible. Those you can’t eliminate completely, need to be evaluated for reduction potential. For example, if driving in bumper to bumper traffic on your commute to the office is a major source of stress, consider using public transportation. Another fitting example is when making time to do lawn maintenance is making your life feel impossible. You can eliminate the stress by simply stop doing it altogether by hiring a lawn service to handle everything or at least reduce your stress by hiring a neighborhood kid to do the mowing for you.

If the main causes of your stress aren’t obvious to you, try jotting down what’s going on and how stressed you feel on a scale of 1-5 whenever you feel stressed in a notebook. Note the patterns after a week or two.

Manage Your Time

When your ‘to do’ list feels out of control, it’s time to tame it. Here’s a quick way to get it under control:

• Create a list of everything you must do
• Break large projects into pieces/steps
• Put the list in order of genuine priority by urgency (immediately, in the next week, in the next month, or when time allows)
• Note which tasks you must do personally, and which tasks can be delegated to others to do
• Assign all tasks that can be delegated to others – be sure to include urgency and priority details
• Do the least pleasant, high-priority, immediately urgent items you must do personally first
• Don’t over-commit yourself to doing too many things on any given day and say no to new tasks that are not high priority
• Don’t underestimate how long things will take – leave plenty of breathing room for unplanned tasks

By taking time to formalize your list, you can remove some tasks entirely by delegating, frame it in more manageable pieces, and see which pieces can be spread out over a longer time frame – all great ways to reduce your stress today and over time.

Learn to Say ‘No’

Keep your task list and stress under control by learning to say “no” to requests that you really don’t have time for. Even the nicest person isn’t obligated to accept every request made of them! By learning to say “no,” you can reduce your stress level, make more time for the things you enjoy, and possibly even gain more self-confidence.

If you’re reluctant to say “no,” you need to figure out why. Do you fear conflict or rejection? Is it that you think you always have to say “yes” to be liked?  Once you know why you’re reluctant, you can create a plan to overcome it.  You might find it helpful to practice “no” phrases such as:

• “I’d love to do this, but I’m under a deadline for another project.”
• “Now is not a good time as I’m already committed to something else. Check with me next time.”
• “I am sorry, but I can’t help with this as I have other priorities at the moment.”

Practice Gratitude

One of the easiest things to do when stress is getting you down, is to forget how fortunate you are. By taking a moment to reflect on all the things that you have and that are good in your life, including your own positive qualities and gifts, things often gain important perspective.

Reframe Problems

Be a glass half full kind of person. Instead of looking at situations from a negative perspective, adopt a positive outlook. For example, you can look at your long commute as a fantastic opportunity to listen to an e-book and learn something new, practice singing to your favorite songs so you’re ready for the next karaoke night, or simply have a few minutes of peace and quiet to yourself or you can fume traffic. Which do you think is going to make your life better?

Look at the Big Picture

Take a mental step back so you can get perspective on the stressful situation before getting upset. This is your opportunity to ask yourself just how important this situation will be in the long run. Will it matter in a month? A year? Five years? Few things will hold up to mattering in a month, much less 1-5 years. If they can’t pass this test, chances are they’re not really worth getting upset over. If you find the answer is no, let it go and focus your time and energy elsewhere.

Accept Those Things Beyond Your Control

You only have true control over a small number of things in your life. By learning to accept that reality, it makes life easier to cope with. While you can’t control the behavior of other people, you can control how you react to them and to other stressful situations.

Break Problems Down

Breaking problems down into manageable pieces is a terrific way to reduce the stress caused by problems that seem unsurmountable on the surface.  Start by coming up with as many workable solutions as you can until one emerges as a manageable solution. Break it down into the sequence of steps that will need to be taken to put the solution into action. Note the what, how, when, who, where of each step.

Adjust Your Standards and Learn to Forgive

Perfectionism is a major source of avoidable stress. When you learn to accept that you’re human and live in an imperfect world, you can stop setting yourself up for unnecessary stress by demanding perfection. People make mistakes, including you. It’s ok. Forgive and move on!

Resolve Issues Before They Become Crises

No one likes to deal with unpleasant topics and circumstances, but the sooner you do, the easier they are to handle. Whether it’s something at home or at work, acting quickly will minimize its potential for turning into something more stressful.

Be Willing to Compromise

Whether in business or in your personal life, if you’re asking someone to change their behavior, be willing to do the same. When you come to a conversation ready to make realistic compromises, there’s a good chance you’ll finding a happy middle ground quickly minimizing the stress of the situation.

Take a Break From the Stressor

It may seem impossible to get away from a big work project, maxed out credit cards, or screaming kids, but it’s not. It starts with giving yourself permission to take a breather to do something else, even if it’s only for a few minutes. Giving yourself time to do something else can give you a much-needed new perspective on the situation. It also gives you time to practice techniques that can help you feel less overwhelmed. Avoiding your stressor altogether may not be feasible or even advisable; the project, bills, and kids do have to be dealt with, but even 5-20-minutes to reset can be helpful. Try listening to your favorite song, stretching or doing yoga, meditating, taking a quick walk, or relaxing in a bubble bath the next time you need a break.

Smile and Laugh

There’s a direct link between your brain and your emotions and facial expressions. If you’re one of the many who holds a lot of the stress in their face, those animal and baby videos online might be just the treatment you need. Laughing can help you feel more relaxed, relieve tension, and improve the stressful situation. Your sense of humor is one of your best weapons in the battle against stress.

Talk About Your Problems

Spending time with someone that makes you feel safe and understood triggers a cascade of hormones that counteract the body’s defensive “fight-or-flight” response providing a natural stress reliever.

The person you choose to talk to doesn’t have to be able to fix your stress, they simply need to be a good listener. Talking things through with someone else can help you find solutions to your stress and put your problems into perspective since stress can cloud your judgment and prevent you from seeing things clearly.

Deep Breathing

Simply stopping what you’re doing to take a few deep breaths can reduce the amount of stress you’re feeling right away. All you need to do is sit or lie down, close your eyes, imagine yourself somewhere peaceful, and take a few deep breaths in and out. You’ll be surprised how much better you feel once you’ve done it a few times.

Avoid Caffeine, Alcohol, and Nicotine

The last thing you probably need when you’re facing stress is raised levels of stimulants or depressants.   Stimulants increase your levels of stress rather than reduce, so minimize or avoid consuming caffeine and nicotine. Alcohol is a depressant that acts as a stimulant in small quantities making its use in alleviating stress is not particularly helpful.

Hydration is more helpful in enabling your body to cope with stress, so opt for water, herbal teas, or diluted natural fruit juices instead of caffeinated and alcoholic drinks. Keep in mind, you should also minimize your consumption of refined sugars as well since they are known to cause energy crashes which may lead you to feel tired and irritable. A healthy, well-balanced, nutritious diet is your best ally when battling stress.

Exercise

Stressful situations increase the level of stress hormones such as adrenaline and cortisol in your body due to our instinctive “fight or flight” response.  Since most stressful situations we face today don’t require our body to use the hormones, physical exercise like taking a walk is a fantastic way to metabolize the excess. This puts you back in a calmer, more relaxed state.

As a bonus, regular exercise can also improve the quality of your sleep.

Get More Sleep

Stress and sleep have a complex relationship. A lack of sleep is a significant cause of stress, yet stress is also known to interrupt our sleep. By practicing good sleep hygiene, you can minimize the impacts of stress on your sleep.

Rest If You Are Ill

Give yourself a break when you are not feeling well. Chances are pretty good that whatever you need to do can wait or can be delegated. The sooner you take time to recover, the better.

Why get treatment?

You can only live so long with elevated levels of stress before it puts your entire well-being at risk. Your physical and emotional health are on the line when stress is leading the way in your life.

Stress mercilessly wreaks havoc on your emotional equilibrium, narrows your ability to think clearly, function effectively, and enjoy life. Stress also impacts your ability to do your job effectively, and it affects how you work with other people. This can have a serious impact on your career and relationships. Long-term stress can also cause conditions such as burnout, cardiovascular disease, stroke, depression, high blood pressure, and a weakened immune system.

Learning to manage your stress effectively paves the way to living a happier, healthier, and more productive life. Creating a balanced life, with time for work, relationships, relaxation, and fun—and the resilience to hold up under pressure and meet challenges head-on is the goal. Start by experimenting with the strategies mentioned to find out what works best for you and be sure to reach out to your physician if you find you’re still struggling to find a workable balance.

Top 10 Ways to Manage Stress Right Now

Here are ten ways designed to help you manage stress while it’s happening. Each situation may require the use of one or more strategies.

1. Pause, take a breathe, and count to 10 before you speak or react.
2. Connect one-on-one with another person or animal. A hug or helping someone else can provide perspective.
3. Step away from the situation for a moment. Even if it’s just to go get a glass of water or a pen and paper before returning, the change of focus can help break the tension and give you a chance to think things through.
4. Take a few slow, deep breaths as you intentionally relax your body starting top your head and going all the way to your toes.
5. If it’s not urgent, see if you can sleep on it and respond tomorrow. This works especially well for stressful work situations, emails, and social media trolls.
6. Try meditating or praying for a few minutes to gain some perspective.
7. Leave the situation for a while. Return once you feel like things have calmed down and you can handle it better.
8. Break down problems that feel insurmountable into smaller steps. Focus on taking one step at a time.
9. Listen to calming or upbeat music or an inspirational podcast to help you deal with road rage.
10. Get active! Head to the gym, out for a walk, go for a hike, or do something else active.